Things that make me go UGH!!!

Okay- so I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything, and I also know that some of you may not care that I haven’t posted anything, and that’s fine. Lately, my life has been, well, it’s been life! Lots of loopholes and cyclones and screaming kids, with an occasional candy cane or rainbow or majestic unicorn. There have been ups, there have been downs, days of laughs and days of nothing.

There is nothing special about this post. Nothing deep or intellectual. This is just a tidbit of my thoughts that I wish to force upon all of you.

These past few weeks have truly opened my eyes to some things. I’ve seen people and things change before my very eyes and it is a bit mind blowing! On the flip side, I have recognized the same selfish laziness in others that, at times, makes me want to set things on fire!!!
So, in the spirit of my confused and irritated mind, I have decided to voice my opinion about a few things. I wish to share my feelings of frustration with the universe or as I like to call it, give the universe a READ!

Shall we begin???
Good! Let’s!!!

Number 1- To the loser last week harassing women in the Walmart parking lot at 7:30am in the morning, Sir! No one has time to listen to your lame pick up lines and inappropriate cat calls. I am sorry to inform you that some women actually have a destination to reach at 7:30 in the morning on a Thursday. It’s called a job!!! Now, I assume you know a little something about this concept, considering you actually had the nerve to ask me for a ride to yours!!! 😳. Next, it is not okay to yell “Aye, yo!” to me to get my attention. NEVER! I have standards and morals and you will respect me or I will let you know how pathetic you are! You can call me stuck up. That’s fine. I’m sure there is some young, naive girl,who would love to respond to the blatant disrespect and rudeness. I’m just not that girl! I could care less about you. The ring on my left finger should have told you that. Next time, check yourself before you go cat calling to random women on the street.

Number 2- To the selfish people who think the world revolves around you. I’m afraid I have some bad news- IT DOESNT!!! Stop being you! Stop thinking about yourself all the time! Did it ever occur to you that the ones you go to for everything need a break? Or maybe, their life does not revolve around you. Has it ever crossed your mind to lend them a helping hand? To reach out to them, the way they reach out to you? Why do you feel the need to EXPECT them to be there for you? Who are you??? It’s really sad that people can’t just be genuinely nice because the selfish ones always have their hand out… Do me a favor, take your hand and shove back in your pocket… HARD!!! Thanks!

Number 3- If you come to me for advice, and I offer it to you, and you choose to do the opposite, understand that that is your business, but do me a favor please? DO NOT come back to me when your situation is the exact same and you are even more miserable than you were the first time. I don’t have time for your drama! If you get off on the dramatics of your life, that is your misery, not mine! I don’t have the patience for it. If you don’t know how to function without complaining about everything, or you can’t carry on a conversation without bringing up how everything in your life is wrong, then perhaps you should seek therapy. I mean, they get paid to listen to all kinds of crap! But be careful… Pretty soon you are going to run out of listening ears…. Ugh!!!

Number 4: I am all for seeking advice from the wise and by wise, I usually mean my mother. I seek her guidance in life areas such as marriage, men in general, and health. Whereas I can understand that there are plenty of people out there, especially women, who have some experience in these areas, if I don’t come to you for help, PLEASE KEEP YOUR OPINIONS TO YOURSELF!!!! It really irks me when people feel the need to tell me about my life. Before I got married they told me why I needed to get married. Now that I am, these losers insist on telling me when to have kids!!! I had a co-worker tell me recently that I needed to hurry up and have kids because I wasn’t getting any younger. Of course, this was before she proceeded to tell me how much her 5 stressed her out!!!! Please! Have SEVERAL seats!
And speaking of marriage, just because me and mine don’t do things the way someone else does, does not make them better than us! My advice to friends about marriage, is make it your own. Find a rhythm and hang with it. Through the ups and downs. That’s it. That’s all I have because I understand one thing: no two men are alike and no two women are alike. As long as there is a mutual understanding between the two everything else is a MOO POINT… Like, a cow’s opinion-which doesn’t matter… ITS MOO!!! (My FRIENDS friends will understand that last one!)

Number 5- and this is my favourite!!! TO THE FORCE THAT IS INSISTENT ON DESTROYING MY HOPES OF ONE DAY BECOMING A MOTHER… you can knock us down all you want but We will always come out on top!!! I will birth multiple babies and they will be awesome and majestic and brilliant and we, note that I did say WE, will laugh at your failed attempt to wreck my womb because I am meant to be a mother!!!

Whew! I feel so much better!
So, universe, I thank you for listening to me rant, but in the future, if you could not be such a jerk sometimes, that’d be great!

And to my Heavenly Father, GOD I thank you for giving me a sound mind and keeping me strong and sane when I want to curl up in a ball and hide away from everyone and everything. Your grace, GOOD SIR, is quite sufficient and I am forever grateful!

Peace to all.

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